Did You Just Say What I Think You Said?

We were having dinner with some Russian friends of ours last week. I was eating with the adults while Andrew was eating with the kids and trying to keep Ella from hurting herself or anything in the apartment. I thought I was following the conversation pretty well until I thought I heard Ludmila ask me if I thought she was getting fatter. I thought, "I must not have understood. Maybe 'tolstaya' has more than one meaning, or maybe she's asking me if she's lost weight or something. Sometimes missing one word can throw me totally off base." So I asked for clarification. She responded by puffing out her cheeks and asking me again, with smaller words, if I thought she was getting fatter. Then her husband nodded and said, "Don't you think she is?" Years of being alive have taught me that there is only ever one correct answer to this question, besides which, I have to confess, I haven't really been keeping track of Luda's weight, so wouldn't have been able to answer honestly if I had wanted to. "No. I don't think you look fatter." Her husband said, "Are you sure? I think she does." I affirmed my initial answer and he shrugged in response. Then the conversation moved on to how fat Americans are and how even Russians who go to America for a few weeks come back unrecognizably fatter. Then I started wondering if they thought I was fat since I was an American, but I decided to just focus on understanding what was being said. But afterwards, when I had time to reflect, I had to wonder if there were some cultural underpinnings I'm not aware of. Is the topic of a woman's weight discussed so casually in mixed company? And does a prudent husband try to persuade a third party observer that his wife really is packing on the kilos? I know in some South American cultures they just tell it like it is by using the most visible attribute as a title for strangers on the street. Terms like "gordo," "flaco," "rubia," "viejo," or "whatever-o" are commonly used with total strangers. Maybe in Russia they discuss the obvious physical attributes at dinner parties too. I guess I'd better start paying closer attention to waistlines so I'll have the right answer next time.