The Lame List

It took Tiffany and I a while to compose our lame list, and it took me even longer (2 months approximately) to find it, refine it, and post it. But here it is in all its glory; the ten things I think are lame:

10. Wearing scrubs in public
9. Crocs; especially on men
8. Proximity to Russia proffered as a qualification to hold national executive office
7. "Muffin Tops" (that band of adipose tissue that protrudes from the top of overly tight, low- rise jeans paired with overly tight shirts and results from an apparent dearth of full length mirrors in Utah County)
6. White framed sunglasses on men
5. Russia
4. Iceburg lettuce
3. T-shirts worn under tanktops
2. "Native" pronunciations of place names ie) "Chilay" for "Chile"
1. The phrase "I've got news for you."

Last Aruba Pictures

Does posting the pictures late make the vacation last longer? Because I could really do with another kid-free trip to Aruba right now. Here Julie is overwhelmed by her pregnancy hormones and responds with an outburst of sisterly affection.

The Sandgrens.

All the sisters together. Check out the sassy poses.

Did You Just Say What I Think You Said?

We were having dinner with some Russian friends of ours last week. I was eating with the adults while Andrew was eating with the kids and trying to keep Ella from hurting herself or anything in the apartment. I thought I was following the conversation pretty well until I thought I heard Ludmila ask me if I thought she was getting fatter. I thought, "I must not have understood. Maybe 'tolstaya' has more than one meaning, or maybe she's asking me if she's lost weight or something. Sometimes missing one word can throw me totally off base." So I asked for clarification. She responded by puffing out her cheeks and asking me again, with smaller words, if I thought she was getting fatter. Then her husband nodded and said, "Don't you think she is?" Years of being alive have taught me that there is only ever one correct answer to this question, besides which, I have to confess, I haven't really been keeping track of Luda's weight, so wouldn't have been able to answer honestly if I had wanted to. "No. I don't think you look fatter." Her husband said, "Are you sure? I think she does." I affirmed my initial answer and he shrugged in response. Then the conversation moved on to how fat Americans are and how even Russians who go to America for a few weeks come back unrecognizably fatter. Then I started wondering if they thought I was fat since I was an American, but I decided to just focus on understanding what was being said. But afterwards, when I had time to reflect, I had to wonder if there were some cultural underpinnings I'm not aware of. Is the topic of a woman's weight discussed so casually in mixed company? And does a prudent husband try to persuade a third party observer that his wife really is packing on the kilos? I know in some South American cultures they just tell it like it is by using the most visible attribute as a title for strangers on the street. Terms like "gordo," "flaco," "rubia," "viejo," or "whatever-o" are commonly used with total strangers. Maybe in Russia they discuss the obvious physical attributes at dinner parties too. I guess I'd better start paying closer attention to waistlines so I'll have the right answer next time.

First Hair Do

Last week we tried pig tails on Ella for the first time. First time doing anything with her hair, actually. She loved them so much, she didn't even pull them out (another first). Now everyday she asks for 'ti tils'.

I Read a Book and I Liked It

As an English major, I often find myself engaged in discussions with my sisters and friends about what we are reading. In fact, the question, "What are you reading" is usually one of my favorites to answer. That is, until a few weeks ago when we were out to dinner with one of our most literary couples, Kathryn and Stuart Snow, both voracious and discerning readers. when Stuart asked me the question, my face froze and a mixture of panic and dread sped from my chest to my face. I knew I couldn't lie, too many witnesses at the table knew the truth. For the first time in my life, the question drew a confession-- The Twilight Series. He was totally aghast. "Isn't that the one about vampires, written for kids?" I could only nod. "Those books are four, five hundred pages each. How many did you read?" My voice was barely audible, "All of them." Shocked, Stuart could only shake his head. "How many are there?" "Four." I tried pathetically to rally, "We just got back from Aruba. It was beach reading." "Fifteen hundred pages worth?" I shrugged, looking to my friend Melissa, with her ivy league credentials, an author herself on whose suggestion I started the series. She tried to defend me by taking the blame on herself. "It's my fault, I told her to read them." But I knew it wasn't really her fault. True, after feeling like maybe I was the only female member of the church who hadn't read the series, her suggestion did push me over the edge, but she didn't make me like it. Or read the whole series in less than seven days, or re-read my favorite parts. It's completely insubstantial fluff, like mental Doritos, maybe even capable of atrophying my brain, but I have to admit, the books were sort of addictive. Even though I recognized the shoddy writing, and my stomach turned at the melodramatic phrases like "His eyes did that smouldering thing again," or "Edward, you... you made me faint..." there was something about them that made them hard to put down. And sometimes, when Melissa and I are alone, we even talk about what we do or don't like about the books, as if there's any dimension to them whatsoever. I guess it ties into the whole high/low culture phenomenon-- the same person who enjoys Dostoevsky is allowed to enjoy a book about a vampire falling in love with a human who he happens to attend high school with-- so long as she know it's corny. At least that's what I keep telling myself. And Stuart doesn't need to know that I watch the movie trailer online or that Melissa and I are secretly emailing our local English-movie theater asking them to show the film when it is released next month.

Early Halloween

Today Ella is going trick or treating at the international neighborhood near Moscow. She is going as a kangaroo this year. She is especially escited about having a tail and a 'baby'. We have been trying the costume on periodically and practicing trick or treating around the apartment. Mostly because I want Ella to be able to have the stamina to last ten houses or so. And so I can eat all her candy.

Aruba Pictures

The vacation was almost a month ago, but that about matches my blog/post rate. Here is Doug, Dad and Kim admiring the conch shell we discovered while snorkeling. Kim is exhibiting proof positive that he is, in fact, Ben's father.
For dad's birthday, we took a jeep tour of the island. Dad got to drive our jeep. He really enjoyed it.
Tessa thoroughly enjoyed the very rough ride. She slept almost the whole time she was in the car.
Even with so many seats, it was a little crowded, but our vacations are all about getting closer...